Drifting Away

For the first time in weeks, I watched one of my church's sermons. I kept having excuses for why I couldn't watch it.

My laptop can't handle playing the video.

I'd rather do it on my day off from work.

I'm too (insert emotion here), it can wait until later. 

I finally put aside my feelings and decided to use my phone to watch them.

The message was about drifting away from Jesus and unconsciously making the choice to unfollow. I'll admit while I do give thought to my faith every day, I'm not always setting forth and making time for it. My excuses for not watching a 30 minute sermon is a prime example of this. Am I really a follower of Christ if I can't even set aside a small chunk of time for Him on a daily basis?

I want to have an unshakable faith.

I want to build my courage and strength.

Most of all, I want to live an extraordinary life.

I'll never grow as a person if I don't lean on Jesus for support.

I've been tempted to go places where I don't belong. I've experienced a great burden and heartbreak from giving into my desires; I made poor choices in the moment. I should have gone straight to God, but instead, I tried to rely on people who don't have my best interests in mind.

Today, I'm making the conscious decision to continue my walk with Christ and not let anything in this world detour me from His plans for my life.

The Cost of Following Jesus

Then, calling the crowd to join his disciples, he said, "If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn away from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me." -Mark 8:34

In my experience, following Jesus is easier said than done. As much as I'd like to pray throughout the day, as much as I'd like to feel close to Him, it doesn't always happen. I'm left with disappointment and guilt when I reflect on my relationship with God.

As Christians, we're meant to give up our life, to stop embracing all our worldly and sinful desires. 

What if it means sacrificing our happiness?

What if we start walking on pins and needles, terrified of making the wrong move in God's eyes?

It's unclear how you can be a true follower of Jesus without losing yourself in the process.

While I believe everything in the Bible is right, I sometimes think it doesn't apply to my situation.

Does this make me any less of a Christian?

Are my shortcomings creating distance between me and God?

I don't understand how I can stop making selfish and superficial choices. It's human nature.

The good news is Jesus doesn't expect perfection from us.

We're allowed to make mistakes and all will be forgiven.

We can leave behind our former selves and become closer to Him, one day at a time.

Coming Out of Troubling Waters

The past week has been troubling, not only for me, but also for loved ones in my life.

My engaged roommates have broken up and it's turned our worlds upside down.

In the midst of this, I'm also fighting a battle within myself. 

I've missed a few days of work due to the stress and anxiety.

Throughout everything, I forgot to pray.

I leaned on my own strength and wisdom, without even acknowledging God.

It's no wonder I started to feel like a failure, worthless.

I kept looking at my life with scrutiny, noticing all the cracks and flaws.

I may have my imperfections, and people may think I'm beneath them, but that doesn't make me any less precious in God's eyes.

"Many who were first will be last, and many who were last will be first.”

Matthew 19:30

I plan to focus on this verse whenever I feel like I'm not good enough.

I'm so blessed to have Kori in my life.

My parents love me unconditionally, even though I take them for granted.

I may not have the type of friends I can hang out with every weekend, but they are the friends whom I can always count on.

My support system may be smaller than most, but God has provided me with all I need.

This week, I will remove any negativity from my thoughts.

I will trust in God and hope for deliverance.

Follow Jesus

At Eagle Brook church, they've started a series of sermons about following Jesus.
 

I think the biggest struggle I've faced in my faith is waiting around to pursue a true relationship with God. I've let my insecurities and wrong doings build a wall between us. Too often, I let my feelings get in the way. I need to spend time in prayer and devotions every day. I can't always say I don't feel like it and I'll do it tomorrow, because tomorrow never comes. 

Yesterday, the pastor used fishing as a metaphorical way to explain the steps toward following Jesus. 

I was intrigued and thought I'd share it here.

Sit and Listen

The first step is to learn who Jesus is and what it means to give him your life.

 

Loan Him the Boat

This basically means to do something that's inconvenient to further your faith. You may not want to wake up 15 minutes early to pray and read the Bible, but it's important to do so.

Take Jesus Fishing

I think, too often, we put Jesus on the back burner when it comes to our life. Seek him out when the waters get rough or even when it's smooth sailing.

Leave Your Nets

If something (or someone) is holding you back and making the journey difficult, by all means leave it (or them) in the past.

Fish for People

Share your faith, it shouldn't be something you hide from the rest of the world.

As for me, I'm following Jesus one day at a time; even if it means making mistakes and not always getting it right. I'm only human.

Heaven is for Real

After weeks of anticipation, I saw this movie with Kori.

I wasn't exactly blown away.

I wish they shared more about the boy's experiences in Heaven. It seemed they only gave a small glimpse into his story.

I'm still gathering my thoughts.
I'm a little disappointed it didn't measure up to God's Not Dead.

I think reading the book might provide a better experience for me.

I have to wonder how accurate it was. I'm sure we all do.

I'd like to research more into near death experiences, especially the young girl who paints what she saw while she was in Heaven. I'd like to learn more about her.

I saw a glimpse of Heaven a few years ago.

All I remember is entering a beautiful land and feeling peaceful, then joy overcame me and I couldn't stop laughing. It's the type of once in a lifetime experience you never want to end.

I know God is preparing a place for me.

One day, I'll meet so many loved ones for the first time and will be reunited with others. All I need to do is have faith and believe.